I ran across this article from a friend, and I love the term “total success” as defined here. Money does not cause happiness, as we know. And, I think many of us have fallen into the trap defined below of working too much and letting our health, exercise routine, self care, relationships, and parenting, sometimes take a back seat. Hopefully we’re all getting wiser — me, included. I’ve written many articles over the years as the “mostly-sane mom” and shared my personal struggles. I’d love it if you’d share your stories in the comments section, too.
See article by Dr. Joe Capista below.
The Truth About Achieving Total Success!
By Dr. Joe Capista
Many people strive for their dream of success, but often miss the one element they absolutely must have in order to achieve their outcome – balance. I speak from the experience of having achieved a very high level of outward success by the time I was in my late twenties, yet my life was far from what could be considered one of Total Success.
Having grown up in an average blue-collar neighborhood my early definition of success was all about how much I could achieve financially. Because of this early measure of success by the time I was in my late twenties, I really felt as if I had arrived. I was making great money, driving a fancy car and living in a big house. Everything I based success on, I had. The harsh reality was, my life was in turmoil. Although I had a level of success, I didn’t have TOTAL SUCCESS.
How many people base success on the outward measures, but if you were to look deeper it would be evident there is much that is missing? What I now know in my mid-fifties is that true success consists of more than what we can achieve financially or materially.
Succeeding only on the material level can often leave other areas of a person’s life completely out of balance. Even though outwardly they appear to “have it all” their life is in turmoil and their lifestyle is killing them. They lack inner-peace and balance.
The fact is, every aspect of life is connected. In order to have Total Success, it is necessary to have balance in all areas of life.
This was a lesson hard learned for me. By the time I had “arrived” I was working way too much; 60 to 70 hours a week, sometimes more. I’d work until ten o’clock on Friday nights and often be in my office on weekends. I was driven to be successful in my business.
I was driven to produce. Nothing was going to stop me. I did what I needed to do continually for the next couple of years. I had arrived, so I thought. What wasn’t apparent to a casual observer was I also had a wife and children I never saw, or saw very little.
Even though I was doing what I thought a good husband should do, my life was very out of balance. I had gained weight, I had the body of a man much older than my chronological years, and I was secretly unhappy and knew there had to be more to life than what I was experiencing.
It was Charlie, my mentor, who taught me the value of creating balance in my life in order to achieve Total Success. Although not quite ready to embrace all Charlie taught me, I was beginning to realize this man 30 years my senior might know what he was talking about.
So often we say to ourselves, “I’m only going to work this hard for a little while. When I achieve a higher level of success then I will slow down.” The reality is, if we are merely driven by outward measures of success, we may never slow down until life slows us down through illness, broken marriages, lost friendships, or any number of ways we are forced to slow down. Often we are forced to slow down long enough to look at our life and admit what we have achieved is only the hope of success and not what success is meant to be.
Charlie is the person who taught me that true success, Total Success, begins with our state of mind and spirit. He would tell me that each person must take responsibility to create balance in his or her life in order to move closer to what can be considered Total Success. To achieve a life of success you must have balance physically, emotionally, spiritually, financially and in your relationships.
It takes discipline to achieve balance in all areas of your life. Yet, it is a discipline in which you have the balance that will allow you to have Total Success.
The reality is the more balanced your life becomes, the more success you can create. The more balance you have the more you will realize what you are capable of and how connected everything is.
All aspects of life are connected at a very deep level. Once you come to realize this you can no longer address one area without addressing another. Once you know this, you cannot longer go back to an old way of thinking, acting and believing. Everything will shift.
As you strive for a life of Total Success every action you take will either move you closer to what you want or further away. You make the choice moment-by-moment, day by day. Choose wisely.
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